Cloid

8th October 2015: Stars align to create our formation

Posted on by TremendArse

Like lots of things in life, the formulation of a football team owes as much to chance and timing as it does to carefully considered construction. None more so than our current first-choice selection in my opinion, which, when you scan through it, is full of near-misses, unlikely success-stories and unforeseen captures.

Take Petr Cech, who would even have dreamed the Chelsea legend would swap Stamford Bridge for Emirates stadium a year ago? Or Hector Bellerin, how many gave him a chance of becoming our undisputed first-choice at right-back in the summer of 2014?

If you replace Gabriel with Laurent Koscienly from Sunday’s starting line-up against Manchester United, you’d be left with most observers’ best Arsenal 11 and you could say every player’s success, or mere presence on the list, is a surprise in one way or the other.

Per Mertesacker? Written off as too slow for the Premier League only to become one half of arguably the best central defensive pairing in the league. Indeed, his usual accomplice in pocketing attackers, Koscielny, was considered a liability at the back a few years ago, yet is now rated as one of the best in the business in his position.

Nacho Monreal was never a good enough left-back people insisted, myself included, yet a spell at centre-back last season brought out a more tenacious side to his game, improved his aerial ability and now you’d struggle to name a better left-sided full-back in the division.

Then there’s Francis Coquelin. Renaissance Coquelin more like, from on-loan at Charlton and a failed left-winger in Germany with Freiburg, to statistically the best defensive midfielder in Europe. Mind-boggling. Alexis Sanchez’s arrival from Barcelona – if you saw that coming, even at the start of summer 2014, you’re either high up the Barcelona hierarchy or a big, fat, liar. Ditto Mesut Ozil. Completely out of the blue.

Aaron Ramsey struggled in his early years, enjoyed a stunningly prolific goal-scoring season in 2013-2014, which was completely unexpected after failing to convince for a number of years, albeit very early ones in his career, was booed by sections of the home support and is now playing very, very well in a new position on the right, providing our side with vital balance.

On to Theo Walcott. In all honesty, I’ve been championing his cause as a striker for years amongst friends, and for the last few months on this blog, yet even I’m slightly surprised at quite how quickly and smoothly he’s taken to the role. I thought it would take him a longer stretch of games to settle up front than it appears to have done.

I’ve left Santi Cazorla until last because not only has his reincarnation as a deep-lying, game-controlling, creative yet defensive, all-action maestro been startling considering his past as either a more advanced number 10 or wide player, but Arsene Wenger has also admitted he was uncertain whether the diminutive Spaniard was physically compatible with a fast, ferocious English top flight. Speaking to Arsenal.com, the boss said:

You could question whether he was physically equipped to play in the tough Premier League. It’s true that I had that doubt, but his quality was so big that I was ready to take that gamble. His technical quality, his right foot, left foot, his availability, his vision and the quality of his passing made me go for it. I thought, ‘If there is a team in the Premier League where he has a chance to make it, it’s with us.’ That’s why I went for it.

Arsene also revealed he’d been aware of Santi’s talents years ago and that Invincible Robert Pires, who played with him at Villarreal, had raved about Cazorla’s quality:

After that Robert Pires moved to Villarreal and played with him. Sometimes I asked Robert, ‘Are there any good players there?’. He said to me straight away, ‘Cazorla is a fantastic player’. So Robert was a scout for me! He at least confirmed the impression I already had about Santi.

Anyway, whether it’s luck, coincidence, cultivation or a concoction of all three, our current selection have a mouth-watering chemistry if Sunday’s showing is anything to go by and I can’t wait to see what they can achieve assuming they stay fit.

Finally for today, the FA have fined and warned both Arsenal and Chelsea following the scandalous clash at the Bridge last month when Diego Costa cheated his side to victory, and some of our fixtures around the Christmas period have been moved around for television.

Back Friday.

7th October 2015: Walcott wants striker role for England

Posted on by TremendArse

Hello and welcome back. Theo Walcott held a press conference while on international duty this afternoon and says he’s ‘buzzing’ after Sunday’s performance against Manchester United and wants to play centre-forward for England.

I know everyone would like to see me up front. Playing there for England, that’s what I want to do.

With the two Dannys, our own Welbeck and Liverpool’s Sturridge, not in the current Three Lions’ squad due to injury and caution respectively, Theo clearly has a greater chance of getting game-time through the middle than he would have otherwise. Whether England have the players capable, or willing, to provide Theo with the requisite service for him to be a success is another matter.

I say ‘capable’ because there’s no English midfielder with even half the creative ability of a Mesut Ozil or a Santi Cazorla, and ‘willing’ because I often get the impression that unlike other top countries, our national selection appear to be in competition with, rather than in alliance with one another. They all want to steal the show, hog the limelight, score the winner etc and very often that means they make the wrong decision when in possession.

Anyway, so long as Theo returns fit and healthy to face Watford on Saturday week, I couldn’t care less if he plays up front or in goal for England, because until we reassess what attributes we rate in a footballer as a country, we won’t be winning anything, so none of it matters. Qualify, don’t qualify – we have as much chance of lifting the Euros next summer as Newcastle do of winning the Premier League this season.

Elsewhere, Ozil has been speaking to German publication Bild about Arsenal’s upcoming Champions League clashes with Bayern Munich and the Gunners’ chances of winning the domestic title. He said:

It is true that there is a lot of pressure on us in the Champions League. We can beat Bayern, though, if we play at the same level as against Manchester United. I was a bit surprised to see Bayern beat Dortmund 5-1. Bayern’s results show that they are in great form. We have a lot of respect for Bayern, but we are not afraid of them. We are playing at home and we know how to score goals and be successful against Bayern. Of course, it will not be easy, but we have the potential to beat any team. We have a great team with a lot of world-class players. Our goal is to win the Premier League title. I think we can achieve it this season if we do not get any major injuries. But the season is still long.

Meanwhile, Ozil’s Arsenal colleague and fellow German Per Mertesacker has been discussing Arsenal’s attacking play in the United win, suggesting the players should be more convinced of their potential for such stunning football. He said:

It’s very important that they find each other in the final third. You could see the little pass from Theo Walcott to Mesut Ozil, how important that was, just a tiny little ball, and on the break we are very dangerous. The start was not shocking for us, I think we are capable of doing that, but we have to kind of remind ourselves that we can do such things.

Maybe one way of reminding themselves would be have the three goals from Sunday played on a loop in the changing rooms before every game but what’s also important to remember, is that the mesmeric quality of our football last weekend was all rooted in a collectively high level of effort. The harder you work, the luckier you get, or whatever the saying is.

Right, that’s where I’ll leave it for today because there is nothing else to talk about thanks to our old friend, Cloid. The lingering c*nt.

Til Thursday.

6th October 2015: Defenders talk, starlet signs

Posted on by TremendArse

Evening all. Cloid is here, so news is scarce, but thankfully, a few of our players have been speaking about various stuff, not least Sunday’s scintillating showing against Manchester United at Emirates stadium, so let’s take a little look at what they’ve had to say.

First up is vice-captain and one half of the blossoming Petr-Per relationship bringing much needed experience, maturity and security to the team, Per Mertesacker. The German World Cup winner says the Gunners ‘clicked’ defensively against Louis van Gaal’s men, called the win ‘special’ and expressed his hope the team’s confidence is just as high after the international break. He said:

We had a good understanding [defensively]. I think a lot clicked today. If one of us won a duel, the other would be there and that was the same in the second half. If he [Anthony Martial] ran past one of us, which can happen, someone else would be there straight away. It went well from the start and that’s always crucial. When you take your chances and are strong defensively, that’s a clear indicator that you feel good. [Sunday] was just special and then it’s always difficult for your opponents to gain a foothold when they are so far behind after 15 minutes. You could see how much the team wanted to respond [from Olympiacos]. As a team you try and remind yourself of what you can achieve and you could see that we have a lot of confidence. I hope that we can display that again in two weeks.

I suppose on the one hand, the current break from club football allows us to savour a brilliant win for a little longer than usual without the risk of a bad result replacing our joy with a new-found sense of doom. But on the other, there is the worry that any momentum in confidence and performance could be lost before the players reassemble to face Watford a week on Saturday.

Particularly when you factor in the potential for injuries while the players are away with their respective countries. So you can fully appreciate Arsene Wenger’s comments about ‘praying’ for his players to return unscathed because there isn’t much the club can do other than hope for the best and perhaps implore national coaches to look after them and not over-train or over-play our players over the next fortnight.

Alexis Sanchez is already a concern of course, with the groin injury that forced him off late in the second half against United, and although Arsene accepted his star forward would want to play for his country, particularly against a team like Brazil who they face later this week, you’d hope sense would prevail regardless of the player’s desire to play and he’s left out if at risk of making his injury worse.

Elsewhere, Per’s central defensive partner on Sunday, Gabriel, has been speaking to ESPN Brazil about his red card at Chelsea and Diego Costa, the Arsenal fans, wanting to stay a Gunner for a long time and learning from his new team-mates. He said:

As I walked off after being sent off against Chelsea I thought the fans would hate me, but the support was unbelievable. I have been tested by Costa before in Spain, I think he knows that we were causing him issues, but this is life, we move on. God is always fair but I should have listened to my manager and Cech when they said not to react to Costa. We will play again. The Arsenal fans make you realise how big this club is, I will post one picture and my phone will go crazy for 3 days. I want to stay here for a very long time, I don’t speak the language yet but I feel at home and this club is perfect for me. Having two players to learn from like Per and Laurent is a gift from God. I am shadowing them and picking up lots of things. I want to learn more from Laurent he is really good at coming from behind and taking the ball, I’d like to bring that to my game. Cech is a great keeper he talks to me a lot, I have learnt a few phrases that I know he will say, he is a leader.

If his refusal to be bullied by Costa and his eagerness to stand up for team-mates is anything to go by, Gabriel posseses plenty of leadership qualities himself, ones which will only grow the longer he’s at the club and maintaining his level of performance. Not wanting to tempt fate but he’s barely put a foot wrong since arriving in January and as many have observed, seems to relish defending as much as Frank Lampard does deep-fried Mars Bars.

Finally for today, Alex Iwobi, who was so impressive in pre-season when given a chance to travel and play with the first-team squad, has signed a new, long-term contract the club confirmed today.

I’ve only seen him play for us a couple of times, including the game in which he scored against Lyon at the Emirates Cup this summer and my initial thought was that he’s quick, slick and a little more efficient in his distribution than say, Chuba Akpom, has looked at times. Who knows how he’ll develop at this early stage but he’s clearly highly regarded by the club and is part of a long list of very promising young forwards on the books at London Colney.

See you on Wednesday.

8th September 2015: Our original Gallic super-striker says Giroud’s ‘not so bad’

Posted on by TremendArse

Like him or loathe him, in his relatively short spell at the club, Nicolas Anelka was a great player for Arsenal. After arriving from PSG in February 1997, the then 17 year old went on to score 28 goals from 90 appearances, including our second in the 1998 FA Cup Final.

He undeniably played a huge role in our Double success in his first full season, and finished the 98-99 campaign as our leading scorer with 17 Premier League goals, being named young PFA Young Player of the Year in recognition of his efforts.

Of course, his tender years, a dodgy attitude and reportedly bad advice from his brothers put paid to any chance of a longer career in north London, and in August 1999, Anelka was sold to Real Madrid for a record fee which famously paid for both our new training ground at London Colney, as well as a certain Mr Thierry Henry. To say Anelka worked out well for us, despite rancour over his forced departure, would be a tad of an understatement.

Anyway, Anelka has hinted in the past that he regrets leaving Arsenal, expressed his admiration for Arsene Wenger and generally sounded very complimentary about the Gunners. Now player-manager of Indian Super League side Mumbai City, the nomadic Frenchman has been speaking about compatriot Olivier Giroud and drawing a comparison with his own time with the Gunners. He said:

Arsene did the same with me – when Ian Wright was there, he didn’t buy anyone and I had to do the job up front. He believed in me and in the end I played regularly and played well. He made the same choice with Giroud. Arsene believes in his team, that’s why he hasn’t spent money. He believes in Giroud because he thinks he will score a lot of goals, which he already has done. When you look at the statistics he’s not so bad. Arsenal won something last season, won something the season before, so why not again? But people have to wait and see and then speak at the end of the season. If they don’t win anything, then you can say something. However, people have to trust Arsene. He knows what he is doing.

Anelka also aired his belief that Arsene is largely responsible for making Arsenal a bigger club than when he took over, highlighted the increased competition to win the title compared to when he donned the red and white, and praised the strength of our current squad, suggesting it is far more talented than people often give it credit for:

Before Arsene, Arsenal were good but they became a bigger club with Arsene Wenger. The way they play football is amazing. In the end, we have to trust him. Of course, you can always say when you don’t win that it wasn’t good enough because the fans want to take the title. But it has become much harder now because you have Man City with big money, Chelsea with big money, Man United, Liverpool. When I was there it was maybe only United who were very strong. Now you have five teams who can fight for the title. You can always say they need to buy someone up front, but previously they have bought Mesut Ozil, who’s a good player, Alexis Sanchez is a good player. They can score goals and give good assists. People just want big names in attack, but Giroud is good enough to score goals. And behind him there are big players who can supply him so he can score a lot of goals. Arsenal have a strong squad – people don’t see it, but they do.

Much as I agree with a lot of what Anelka says here, I think most people do accept that this is a very good Arsenal squad right now, but are frustrated at what was a very quiet transfer window compared to other clubs, and perhaps take issue with the club’s line that there were no available players, anywhere in the world, who could have improved our squad.

As far as strikers go, although better finishers than Giroud changed clubs this summer, it’s likely Arsene didn’t feel they were enough of an upgrade on his current lot to be worth pursuing. The counter argument of course, is that even if you only find incremental improvement in the market, you should do it, particularly when you reportedly have the disposable income to take a punt or two.

But there’s not much we can do about it now and as we approach a return to club football, It’s time for Giroud to put his nightmarish international break behind him, show Arsene was right to go with what he has and repay the trust put in him to lead the line this season.

See you Weds.

7th September 2015: Who could best play ‘false forward’ for Arsenal?

Posted on by TremendArse

Good evening. There’s an Indian summer on the way to Britain apparently, which means it will feel nice and warm outside while most of us are cooped up in an air-conditioned office all day, before rapidly cooling to about minus 8 by the time we clock off and head home. Brilliant.

And I’ll tell you what else was brilliant – Germany’s intricate, pass and move football tonight. Efficiently Spain-esque. With Borussia Dortmund’s Ilkay Gundogan in the hole behind former club-mate Mario Gotze, our own Mesut Ozil to the left and Thomas Muller on the right, as Bastian Schweinsteiger and Toni Kroos added balletic ballast to the middle of the park behind them, the World Cup winners were a joy to watch.

Admittedly, two uncharacteristically bad pieces of ‘keeping by Manuel Neuer allowed hosts Scotland to twice wipe out a goal by Muller, but Germany’s class told in the end as Gundogan coolly guided home a first-time effort off an upright to secure a 3-2 win.

It did make me wonder about the need to always play a target man up front. Germany had Gotze acting as a false forward today and although a big, slick pitch helped Germany to find space, it highlighted for me, the fact that if you have intelligent footballers in every position tuned into the same wavelength and all thinking two, three steps ahead, having a big lump in the middle, or even blistering pace out wide, becomes less important.

Because you domintae the ball, rest in possession, which in turn allows you to hunt in packs at high energy and win the ball back very quickly and efficiently, which means it’s usually a matter of time before your next goal-scoring opportunity arrives. Spain set the standard, Germany have almost matched it I’d say, and if one or two other countries can come close to putting together a similar-minded selection of players by next summer, the Euros would be all the more exciting and open as a contest.

And perhaps if Olivier Giroud and Theo Walcott continue to struggle up front in Danny Welbeck’s absence, it might be worth us trying a striker-less system at some point. Obviously with so much riding on each game in the league and in Europe, trialing new formations is very risky, but if we find ourselves with a meaningless game at the end of the Champions League group stages for instance, trying Jack Wilshere, Aaron Ramsey or maybe even Santi Cazorla as our most advanced attacker would be an interesting exercise. We could marvel at mendacious Jack, sophistical Santi or ersatz Aaron. Then ask the boss what the f*ck he was thinking if it doesn’t work. Win win.

Provided that is, whoever was chosen, kept some discipline, occupied the space around the opposition defence and didn’t get sucked into the build-up play too often. I thought Gotze did that brilliantly tonight, displaying velvety close-control, great movement and providing a constant goal threat despite not boasting size, strength or pace, among his best attributes as a player.

Andrei Arshavin was once deployed at the tip of our attack of course, but it only works if the player moves and as we all remember, our former little Russian was a little on the lazy side. And by lazy I mean he was scandalously inactive – on a good day.

Anyway, as you may have guessed from the fact I’m doing my best to Pep up this blog with groundbreaking tactical thoughts, there’s very little to talk about Arsenal-wise today. Thankfully, we’re not too far from emerging from Cloid. Before we do though, England host Switzerland at Wembley tomorrow evening and with a chance of being on show is Basel’s teenage striker Breel Embolo.

The 18 year old is very highly rated by many observers, including German football writer Rafael Honigstein who’s tipped the player to become a ‘superstar’. Unsurprisingly, several big clubs around Europe, allegedly including us, are already eyeing up bids for the player and Wolfsburg reportedly had an offer rejected on deadline day last week.

There’s nothing like a new starlet worth scouting to get me up for watching what would otherwise be merely another mundane international friendly. I just hope Embolo gets some minutes to show what he’s got.

Til Tuesday.

6th September 2015: Coquelin and Cech on Euro hopes

Posted on by TremendArse

Evening. Thanks for dropping by. A post as short as an amnesic goldfish’s memory for you today, because A. I can’t really be arsed, and B. there is so little going on Arsenal-wise, that Newsnow may as well suspend it’s dedicated category. Thanks a lot Cloid.

Aaron Ramsey was in action for Wales earlier this afternoon and they could have secured qualification for next summer’s Euros with a win over Israel, but failed to find the net and had to settle for a goalless draw. Hal Robson-Kanu, who led the Welsh attack, was released by Arsenal as a kid apparently. I didn’t know that until today, so thanks Twitter. And if you didn’t before reading this entry – you’re welcome.

But speaking of the Euros, they take place in France, who will be hosting their first tournament since they won the World Cup on home soil in 1998, and Francis Coquelin has been telling the official site how he would love to force his way into Didier Deschamp’s squad for the tournament. He said:

Every player wants to represent their country and the Euros in France is something massive for any French player to be a part of. To be part of the squad would be amazing but there are loads of things to do first and the most important thing is Arsenal. If I play well here maybe I will get a chance for France, but the most important thing is Arsenal. As any French player would, though, you want to play for France and hopefully it can happen one day. It would be unbelievable. I won the Under-19 Euros and it was something unbelievable as well. To win the Euros with the French national team would be even more crazy. If I perform well here, maybe I will get the chance to play for France but I think the most important thing is to stay focused on Arsenal and then things will come along.

Aside from the fact Francis is proving himself to be a very, very good footballer, his mentality should be highly merited too. Not only are his words above a great reflection of a man who’s grounded and focused, but his on-pitch demeanour since he established himself in this Arsenal team epitomises the kind of traits that detractors of Arsene Wenger’s side so often highlight as supposedly lacking. He’s vocal, an organiser, and showcases genuine leadership qualities. And the 24 year old, despite at the time being about seven by my maths, fondly remembers watching Thierry Henry and co lift the World Cup:

Of course I remember it. All my family were watching the games so I remember it well. It was such a great feeling. To play in front of a home crowd in France would be unbelievable with the support of all the French people. We have to wait and see, and work hard, that’s the most important thing.

Elsewhere, Petr Cech has also been discussing the upcoming international tournament, telling the Arsenal Magazine he hopes the Czech Republic can still secure qualification after dropping points in both of their last two fixtures. He said:

Since I joined the national team, I’ve never missed a European Championship. I’ve always qualified. Ever since I was 16 I’ve played in every single European Championship at every level so I hope that run will continue. I used to play in France and it would be special for me to play the Euros there. We had an absolutely brilliant start to the campaign. We won our first four games, including matches against Holland and in Turkey. Unfortunately we’ve dropped points in the last two games – we drew at home against Latvia, which was a blow because we had a lot of chances. In our last game we played Iceland away and although we went 1-0 up, we lost the match. I think this is the game we look back at and can have regrets because if we had got a point or three, it would have put ourselves much closer to our target. We complicated our situation a little bit but we are still second and have four games to play. I believe that we have the team to qualify and hopefully we will prove it.

I bet Cech wishes his country could call on our effervescent number seven Tomas Rosicky right now, but hopefully they can secure a place in the finals and Rosicky can have something to look forward to after another prolonged period on the sidelines.

See you next week.

5th September 2015: Theo bags brace as Cloid continues

Posted on by TremendArse

Welcome back. I was going to watch England’s game in San Marino today, but then I remembered I’d rather go to a back-street dentist for some molar extractions, before settling down to watch the Chelsea season-review DVD dressed in a Spurs kit, so I gave it a miss and vacuumed my car instead.

England’s consistent selection of James Milner in midfield and a Wayne Rooney who’s about as mobile as a mountain as a lone front man irks me enough, but to then see them send balls straight out for a throw with their ‘first touch’, whilst playing amateurish opposition on a Sunday league-level pitch is just too much for the footballing purist in me to put up with I’m afraid.

One day, I hope there will be an England manager who picks a side based on which players are compatible with others to create a coherent ‘team’, rather than select ‘names’ because of their profile, but until then, actual tournament football remains the only time I’m inclined to give the Three Lions a watch.

Anyway, a quick check online tells me Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain started on the right of the England attack and Theo Walcott bagged a brace as a second-half substitute. The goals will obviously be a boost for Theo’s confidence, even if they did come against the traditional whipping boys of the European game, and hopefully he can add to his England tally against Switzerland next week before returning to Arsenal reinvigorated in front of goal and primed to put four past Jack Butland when we host Stoke.

And speaking of Premier League football, Nacho Monreal, who overcame a slightly indifferent start to his career in north London after moving from Malaga to establish himself as first pick at left-back ahead of Kieran Gibbs, has been speaking to the official site about the English top-flight differing from La Liga and also how he’s changed as a player as a result. He said:

I’ve always said that it’s a different type of football here. In Spain there is more of a focus on tactics, technique and positioning, whereas in England it is more physical. The fans like seeing box-to-box play and lots of direct runs, so I think on a physical level I’ve improved because you have to get used to English football. I’ve certainly got better in that regard. The Premier League is one of the most popular leagues in the world and in Spain virtually everyone follows the Premier League as it’s very entertaining for the viewer. There are lots of staff working for the Spanish national team who watch lots of English matches and come here to watch us, so I don’t think it has much of an effect on my chances of being selected.

Nothing to argue with from Monreal there because everything he says is true; the Spanish game is more cultured and calculated whereas the Premier League is your go-to division for break-neck speed football, well, most of the time anyway.

And he’s certainly improved his physicality in the challenge. Initially, he seemed a bit stand-offish when it came to attacking the ball but ever since he was forced into a stint at centre half last season, I think the Spaniard has improved his overall defensive game immeasurably, whilst maintaining his naturally composed distribution at both ends of the pitch.

I suppose my only gripes with his game would be his crossing could be more consistent and he could get on the scoresheet a little more often, as he showed he’s quite capable of doing at Old Trafford in the Cup last season, but other than that, he’s probably the best left back we’ve had since a certain turncoat nearly crashed his car and defected to the dark side.

And I have to say, I like the fact both our current first-choice fullbacks are so comfortable in possession because I think it has a massive effect on our overall ball-dominating desires. I mean, for all of Bacary Sagna’s defensive solidity at right back and Gibbs’ lung-bursting efforts on the opposite side for instance, neither of them are in the same class with the ball at their feet.

Of course Sagna’s departed the club but I think the same deficiencies hamper Carl Jenkinson and Calum Chambers if i’m honest, and given the amount of possession our fullbacks often enjoy because of the way we build from the back, having two players like Monreal and Bellerin (or Debuchy) aids our particular style of play TremendArsely.

Til tomorrow.